Facebook Evils: When You Block Family

Social media has created all kinds of new ways for people to debate, argue, disagree, or whatever you would like to call it. Social media can bring people together with pages and groups and create lifelong friendships. Or it creates disaster. Cheating spouses, public marital spats, family talking behind one another's backs and, my favorite, the passive aggressive posts that are just BEGGING for someone to ask "is everything okay?" or to offer a shoulder to lean on "oh honey, I'm here for you!". With all of the misunderstandings that already exist in spoken language, social media, e-mail and text messages have just driven that wedge even deeper. So what happens when you unfriend and block your "real life" friends and family on social media? They FREAK OUT. Exclamations of "I don't know what I did" or "I just don't understand! I don't deserve this!" begin to show through and people who don't have the family member or members blocked start to tell you about the things they're saying. The hurt. The drama. Then you think to yourself "THIS IS WHY I BLOCKED YOU." and you thank them for reinforcing what you're already well aware of: you don't need them all up in your social media business, posting dramatic comments or disagreeing just to argue and try to make you look bad. The bottom line here is that social media does not equate life; if you think that someone blocking you on social media means that they don't love or like you anymore, you're a moron. So what are some of the reasons to give your family the axe on social media? I can name three big ones to start off.

1. They disagree with everything you post, and not quietly.

Let's say you don't believe in Christianity. Let's say your brother is an avid Christian. How well do you think it would go over to have your brother on your friend's list? Something resembling a popsicle in July popping into your head? Mine too. Posting snarky or antagonizing comments on your family and friend's feed when they disagree with you is pretty much asking to be removed. It's okay to disagree and have your own opinion. It's even okay to disagree, comment and debate with the person. But, being passive aggressive, sarcastic and rude definitely will not get you anywhere.

2. Their page is full of pointless drama that is passive aggressive or out right offensive.

"What a HORRIBLE day!" "I'm so sick of this bullshit!" "My life sucks". Look familiar? If this is what your family's pages look like, I would unfriend them, too. "Calling someone out" on social media is not effective either, even if you use names, but it is even less effective when you don't give the person you're bashing the chance to defend themselves. It's even worse when the dramatic post has 100 plus comments and keeps being pushed to the top of your news feed. I have blocked family and they always proclaim "I don't even post anything, I don't know how you could find it offensive or say I'm being dramatic!". The only things you post are dramatic, calling people out (without their name of course) about so called rumors they've started or things they're saying about you that you've heard through the grape vine. This is gossip and gossip equals drama.

3. You live entirely different lives.

Your parenting styles are polar opposites. You don't vaccinate, they do. You believe in natural medicine, they run to the doctor at the first sign of a sneeze. Again, as stated in item number one, how would that go over? Remember the popsicle in July? Yeah. Sometimes unfriending and blocking are the kindest thing you can do to spare someone's feelings and to keep disagreements out of family life. Plus, if you don't talk to each other in "real life", why would it matter if you keep in touch using social media? It seems like no matter how far apart you are in life, don't you DARE unfriend me on social media. You would think the Earth was falling in.

That's it for this post, because it has stemmed from being sick and tired of explaining myself each time I feel like I don't want someone to show up on my friend's list. It's simple and bears repeating in case someone didn't understand: SOCIAL MEDIA DOES NOT EQUATE LIFE. Just because I don't want to be your friend online doesn't mean we can't be friends in life, but let's face it, if we have that many differences, why do you want to be friend's anyway??

Thanks for reading everyone! Be sure to tell us in the comments about your experiences with family and social media!

Are You a Woman Promoting Sexism?

Today I went to the local fair and sat through a demolition derby. For those of you who do not know what that is, it's a bunch of rednecks (for lack of a better term) smashing cars into each other to see who can last until the end without their car's parts locking up or giving out. Or starting on fire. Or rolling their car over. They're all crazy, just so you know. 

Anyway, while sitting elbow to ass cheek with about 3,000 strangers and wearing mirrored shades so I could look and no one would know (LOL), I noticed women wearing shirts with interesting phrases. As I began to read them, I noticed some were funny, while others I found not so funny. Now, I'm sure some of you will comment and say "OMG really?!?!!? It's supposed to be funny!" or "Learn to take a joke!", but I have to say this: WHY should women have to take it as a joke? Would it be funny if the joke were belittling a minority? People who are overweight? A man? You see, when a women wears a shirt that says "forget the housework..." as a beginning phrase, I immediately think "how the hell can she wear that?". Not because the shirt is revealing, or even ugly. It's because the phrase on the shirt is blatantly and outright SEXIST and no one seems to care! NO ONE CARES. Why? Our culture? 

The best thing I can think to say to describe this is empowering. Some of these women find it empowering to take the sexism and use it to their advantage.  Pink camo and pink guns (WHY THE FUCK, by the way?) are just the beginning and women are VOLUNTARILY buying and wearing these things. Shirts saying "trophy wife" or "perfect 10", or even shirts that say "hottie" or other terms of endearment that reference our bodies are disgusting and sexist. It always seems that women are looked at for their appearance and not what they have achieved or their brilliant minds. Campaigns for "real" beauty and a "real" body are just more sexist ways to objectify women's bodies and use us as sex symbols.

I, for one, would NEVER wear an item of clothing that "compliments" my looks or my status as a woman through glossy and/or glittery lettering. I just won't. I am a woman. I have a brain, eyes, a mouth and two arms and legs, just like a man. I can do what men can do and MORE, because I can nourish life. I can juggle being a mom, a support network and a best friend. I can cook, clean, text and talk with and love my family. I can grow beautiful flowers and vegetables. I am compassionate and kind, and I care a great deal about nature and our Earth. I love animals and I can't kill anything living. I am trying SO HARD to not eat meat, because it hurts my soul to think about the life taken for the food on my plate. This has nothing to do with if I am "beautiful" or not, because my soul is, and it doesn't stick out for the world to see. 

Women are so much more than tits and ass and we deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. How are we supposed to do that running around wearing walking billboards claiming "OBJECTIFY ME!"? Wake up women and be more than your skin, show the world who you are and what you can give to this Earth. Live to your full potential!